Happy Mother's Day

'Happy Mother's day' Mummy... Words fail me: I cant even begin to express my love for this woman or how much I love her but she is an absolutely amazing woman and she rocks. Growing up, I didn't quite understand her strengths but I've come to realise how strong and beautiful she really is.

She is a rare breed and even if I had as many tongues as I had strands of hair on my head, it still wouldn't be enough in thanking God for making me hers. Some people say their moms are their best friends, I wouldn't say the same. The term 'good friend' would be more appropriate cos she never hesitates to remind me she is the 'mother' in the friendship :)... She reads my blog sometimes -so mummy if u see this, I love you. No matter how much she screams, rants and raves (with good reason) she still gives the best advices and never fails to protect. 

A few of her popular sayings include: " Don't compare yourself with other people' 'Don't use other people's achievement as a benchmark for urself', and the most importantly 'Always put God first'. She's very wise isn't it? :) 

The world is a more beautiful place with her in it and the love she consistently gives make all the difference.

I love her so much and I pray God grants her heart desires and more.  

Yes Or True

Remember when I put up a post 'Wifey 101: Supply and Demand'...written by a friend supporting guys and all?!? Well, I have written something some may not entirely agree on...and I was gonna put a lil disclaimer before, cos I wasn't too sure if I was ready to share this. Oh well its a thought, no need to disclaim it so here it goes!

Well... first, it is quite irritating when I hear young men of 24 or 25 or even 27 considering marriage. Don’t get me wrong though! It’s when these guys are still living with their parents having no prospects for jobs that upset me the most. It even gets worse... I think those currently enrolled in the NYSC programme who earn just a few thousands should be slapped and the girls who cheer them on or are eagerly waiting to accept their proposals should be ambushed...lol. I don’t mean to come across as intolerant or brash; I just think marriage in itself comes with a million and one problems so why add to the list, the challenges and discomfort that lack of money breeds. I mean marriage is a different ball game. 

I have however observed a pattern. I noticed that on the average, Yoruba young men tend to be lazy. My premise is based on the fact that their peers in other cultures are burdened with paying exorbitantly before getting a bride and as such work twice as hard to alteast pay-off the associated costs. I have come across a good number of Yoruba *sorry to hurt feelings* guys who have no issues living off their girlfriends or wives. They are the ones who support phrases like ‘couples should grow together’ and I agree but does it mean that when one marries a more responsible working class male who can conveniently take care of his family, they are not growing together?!?... (hmmm... smh). My point is, I sincerely believe a guy who is seriously considering settling should ask himself a few questions and the very most important ones being: If my wife doesn’t work or is unable to support the family financially, what sort of life would I be able to give my family? What quality of education would my children get? Would it always be a case of something has to be sacrificed for a need to be met etc...?  If you ask me, it’s not asking too much. Its not even about being a gold digger, its just what it is.

Then of course, I am aware that some guys actually work their as* off but still don’t earn so much... 'What then' you may ask?!  

The conclusion is that everyone should understand themselves well enough to know under what circumstance they can or cannot cope because there’s no point giving any guy a hard time when you knew his situation but still agreed to go on with it. Truth is, circumstances do vary for different people and one's choice doesn’t make them a saint and another a snob because we never can tell what past experiences have informed each person’s judgement. Just to be clear on my point of view, it would be good you understand that my focus is on marriage and not a relationship

Am i right or am i right :) what do you think?!

Happy Birthday Auntie Abim Bim

Today is my auntie's birthday....and today last year, I remember so clearly walking up the stairs on my way to class wishing her a happy birthday. I remember a few lines if not all of our conversation... I know she was going to have dinner at four points by Sheraton in Lagos with a few people. We cracked a few jokes and she talked about planning my wedding which she always said in every conversation we had... yes she was an event planner

Fast forward 6 months later, my auntie passed on to glory... She left behind her dad, husband, children, siblings, nieces, nephews, cousins and friends. Sometimes I still find it hard to believe that she's gone and none of us will see her on earth again. 

I'm writing this simply to wish her a happy birthday, a rare gem, a wife, a daughter, a mother, a sister, an auntie, a friend, someone oh so special, a precious woman, to say I have enough words to blog about you is to lie. I speak to the little reminders of you and I’m so happy they are all making you proud, I can't even go on to say how but i know you look down and smile all the time. I know we are all still heartbroken, everyone cries every now and then, I can sense the sadness but deep in our hearts we are glad you lived and touched every life you came in contact with. I’m so glad I could tell you how much I loved you and how much you meant to me. 

You will forever remain in our hearts, as to live in the hearts of those you love is not to die.

11/03/67 - 09/09/11

Revelations 14:1 (Blessed are the dead which die in the Lord from henceforth Yea, saith the Spirit, that they may rest from their labours; and their works do follow them) ... I felt empty when you left..but after reading this I know u don't want us to feel empty.. you want us to smile, open our eyes, love and go on....

The Wait

She struggled to get out of bed that Sunday. As a matter of fact, she decided she won’t be attending church as she preferred the smell of dawn much better from her bed. As though tugged by her conscience, she suddenly jumped off the bed recalling the vows she had made concerning service and how it was more about worshiping God than it was of enjoying the service or getting the next word for the journey.

Within the hour, she rushed to get ready and not wanting to miss the bus, she had one of the quickest showers of her life. Before exiting her apartment, she reminded God in a silent prayer of how she hoped to meet with Him and how sorry she was to have considered not attending service that morning.

At this time, the sermon had ended; the music had stopped playing and all that was heard was a brief moment of silence which was almost immediately followed by a string of prophesies. She hadn’t always approved of prophesies or even thought they could ever relate to her but seated at her usual row which was right at the fore, she was absolutely oblivious to what she was doing: her deepest desires had taken over and her heart only beckoned at the words that came from the preacher who remained under the influence of the Holy Spirit. Unconsciously, she bowed her heart quietly to allow the Lord minister to her. 

The words were clear and even the deaf wouldn’t have missed it! They were precise and when she had heard it, she pondered. Not wanting to desperately grab one that wasn’t truly for her, she took out a few seconds to truly ensure the words uttered matched her innermost desires. Tears filled her eyes as she realized the match. She had always seen others get their answers straight from the pulpit but had never experienced it herself; she had wished for it but never imagined it was going to happen as it just did. Careful not to let the tears run down her cheeks, she contained herself, thanked the Lord and left the rest of the crying, praising and rejoicing for when she got home.

Being new at this, she spoke to a close friend of hers and asked how one can be certain that a particular word is meant for them. Quite unsure and some sort shy herself, her friend had no defined explanation. Irrespective, they both rejoiced at the good news and eagerly anticipated its manifestation. The words were very specific even down to the timing. She waited expectantly and kept at it till it dawned on her that it was now sooner than ever before –it was now only a day left for the unveiling.

That day passed and fizzled out like the rest and nothing happened. All she heard herself saying was “Lord... I guess I heard wrong; I guess it was for another; please take care of me”. Surprised by her reaction herself, she remained calm and simply left it all in His hands. 

Does this mean she did not fully believe to have been that calm after a no-show? One would have expected that she would slide into a depression or something of that sort but I guess that peace that surpasses all understanding whispered to her an assurance that God will take care of her either ways. When we pray and not receive, could it be that God thinks we are not fully ready to handle it at the time? Could it mean that His plans are different? Or that we’ve done something to delay it’s occurrence? I’m unsure myself but one thing I know... I’m absolutely certain that God does that which He says He will do because He is no man that He should tell a lie.